Post by RYTCHZ MAGIC on Oct 6, 2005 15:47:10 GMT 9
HOST: WERE YOU EXCITED WHEN OUR BET did so well in the international competition?
Guest: Of course! It was so exciting to see her on TV, greeted with hundreds of enthusiasm!
(How—enthusiastic!)
***
Host: What is this cream and alcohol treatment good for?
Guest: With vigorous brushing, it’s good for the exploration of dead skin.
(Like going on a skin safari!)
***
Host: What is the magic ingredient here that makes it so effective?
Guest: It has national oils!
(The perfect solution to the nation’s oil crisis!)
***
Host: What did you find touching about the TV coverage of the aftermath of the Katrina hurricane?
Guest: The blind man who didn’t see his dog until three days after the hurricane!
(The blind man sees? It’s a miracle!)
***
Host: Who will be the beneficiaries of your concert?
Guest: Not just the military victims, but also all the other victims of human rights. (Ay, victims of human rights!)
***
Host: We’ve come to the end of our show—
Guest: Can I plug? Next Thursday will be the launching of my new book!
(Kulit.)
***
Newscaster: More terrorist news: In Iraq yesterday, another bomber blew himself!
(Until he was as big as a weather balloon?)
***
Host: After applying the paint on our faces, what should we do?
Guest: After the party, when you don’t need the paint anymore, just take it off with soup and water.
(You’ve just ended up with soup on your face!)
***
Host: How was our RP team’s performance in the recent sports fest abroad?
Guest: Objectively, it was not up the par.
(Ay, up the par!)
***
Newscaster: Samantala, bumagsak bahagya ang halaga ng ... bagyong Rita sa Estados Unidos!
(That’s what happens when the texts of two different news items gets jumbled up!)
***
Newscaster: The brunt of the new typhoon was borne by the state of Sexas.
How can you think of ... Sexas at a time like this?
***
Host: What songs do you sing?
Guest: All sorts—international.
Host: Oh really? For example, are Japanese songs part of your repitar? Repitoir? How do you say it?
(Repertoire—and, as a TV host, you’re supposed to know that!)